No time in the mornings to write. And the day flew past like a blur. 8 plus miles was on the menu for today. It was so, so cold and wet. The wind ripped into us like a freezing hurricane. The marchers seemed to be in pretty good spirits. All of the marchers except Kim. Kim and I started out this morning at a slower pace than she walked yesterday. (as if that is possible) She complained non stop for almost 4 hours. I tried everything I could to encourage her. Nothing I could say.. nothing I did, seemed to matter. She was hell bent on her bad attitude. She kept saying that there are so many other ways to lose weight that would be easier than this. I will admit losing weight can be done many different ways… but none of them seemed to have worked for her to this point. I pleaded with her to try my way… just for a while.
After 4 grueling miles (having to hear her complain) she decided to stop. Now the way the rules of fat march go, she is allowed to stop for the day without forfeiting any prizie money, but she will have to make up the mileage over the rest of the stage with no extra time allotted to make up those miles. I was so discouraged for her. She has the potential to be at the front of the pack. I have always prided myself on being able to encourage anyone in any situation. I failed to see a fundamental part of that equation. Kim has to really want this experience to work for her. She doesn’t really believe in herself and I know she doesn’t believe in my abilities. She just wants to buy her way to being fit. That will never happen. She needs to come to the end of herself… no excuses…no magic remedy… just die to that ol’e “fat” person and decide that this journey could be the one that saves her life. And still she quit. At the point of tears, I decide to leave her there on the side of the road for the production crew to take her back to the camp ground. I wasn’t done with her… I just needed a break. Profound as it may be… as soon as I left Kim the sun came out, just for a second but sunshine none the less. I realized I would have to run 4-5 miles if I was to catch up with the rest of the group.
As I was running with all my gear I started to get very hot. I was looking for a place in the middle of this small Connecticut Town to take off some layers of rain gear. I didn’t want to sweat and have wet clothes because when I stopped walking for the day I would have risked hyperthermia…plus I hate a wet sweaty butt! Ughhh! SO the only place I could find to change was the town hall. As I walk in I realize this is a federal building and I have all kinds of camping gear… like pocket knives, I also am wearing a wireless transmitter which I am sure would look funny taped to my chest if someone was to walk in the bathroom while I was changing. But my only thought was catching up to the group incase some of the others needed help. SO of course as I am changing I took 3 of my knives out of my rain gear and laid them on the sink, and as I took off my shirt exposing the wireless microphone taped to my chest someone enters the mens room. Ughhh! I thought that was it for me. I had no producers around… no one to vouch for me, I am sure I looked like the uni-bomber in this federal buildings bathroom. I got dressed as fast as I could and took off running south down mains street. That was a close one…
About three miles further I slowed back down to a walk as I noticed a huge commotion a few blocks up the road. I stopped to ask an onlooker what was going on and they told me that someone fell unconscious just up ahead. The ambulance drove right past me with, what I learned later was, Anthony in it. I am still unaware of his condition. I have all kinds of things going through my head. I wondered if I wasn’t back with Kim, someone who doesn’t even want to be here, if I could have helped prevent Anthony’s predicament. The peculiar thing is two people didn’t finish today. One just gave up and quit for no reason, other than lack of desire, and the other tried and tried until their body just shut down and couldn’t continue. Is there more I could have done for Kim? Should have been there for Anthony? Either way…I won’t be sleeping very well tonight. Ughhh!!!
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